I'm coming out... as a Mormon Feminist

I am very tempted to come out as a Mormon Feminist.

Oh, wait, you're reading this, so I guess by writing this I'm doing so. Man, this is only my first day of this blog, and I'm already dropping the bomb.

I'm warning you that this is going to be VERY long, but at least try to read the last seven paragraphs if you get bored of that long list.

What is a Mormon Feminist? Here's a couple of paragraphs from mormonfeminist.org:


What is feminism?
Simply put, feminists want equality for everyone, women and men. Feminists advocate for everyone to have the same opportunities in life - politically, economically, and socially.
Secularly, feminism is an ongoing conversation. While equality is the overall goal of feminism, feminists can disagree over what “equality” means and how to achieve this goal. This is because feminists are all different: they are made up of people from different cultures, countries, races, sexual orientations, religions, economic backgrounds, political parties, religions, genders, ages, etc. Feminism is not one organized movement, but a shared ideal.

What is Mormon feminism?
Mormon feminism shares the goal of equality that feminism has, but within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and within LDS culture. Like general feminism, Mormon feminism is made up of a very diverse group of people. Mormon feminists also do not always agree on what “equality” means or how to get there, but they are all invested in the ongoing conversation. We love to share experiences, discuss ideas, and support one another.

So, why am I identifying myself as a Mormon feminist?

Because I want equality. Because I want change. Here's an interesting campaign I found from one of my new favorite websites, feministmormonhousewives.org (the actual web address is http://whatwomenknow.org/all_are_alike/). (I hope they don't mind me copying and pasting.)


All Are Alike Unto God

As Mormon women, we call upon the First Presidency, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, and Relief Society General Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to thoughtfully consider and earnestly pray about the full integration of women into the decision-making structure of the Church and the question of women’s ordination.

In the interim, we join many others in suggesting some simple changes in institutional policy that will foster a more equitable religious community:

• Encourage partnership in marriage and eliminate the idea that husbands preside over their wives.
  
  
• Create parity in the Young Women and Young Men organizations through equivalent budgets, educational programs (leadership, career, and spiritual training,) and activities (sports, service, and outdoor events).
  
  
• Balance the stories and images of boys and men in church publications, talks, and other media with stories and images of girls and women.
  
  
• Invite women in Church leadership positions to speak and pray during General Conference in numbers equal to the participation of men.
  
  
• Encourage leaders to use gender-inclusive language whenever possible.
  
  
• Recognize that girls and boys, women and men are equally responsible for appropriate sexual behavior, and avoid reducing morality to sexuality, and modesty to a preoccupation with women’s and girls’ clothing.
  
  
• Instruct bishops to refrain from asking Church members probing questions about sexual practices and experiences.
  
  
• Call women to perform pastoral counseling, particularly for women and girls who have been sexually abused.
  
  
• Choose a General Relief Society Presidency and General Board that reflect the diversity of viewpoint and circumstance in the Church, and establish frequent meetings between the First Presidency and the General Relief Society Presidency.
  
  
• Include the Stake Relief Society President in Stake Presidency meetings, and appoint women to meet with the High Council.
  
  
• Delegate more expansive supervisory authority to the Stake and Ward Relief Society, Young Women, and Primary presidencies, including approval of personnel, programs, and activities.
  
  
• Include women among stake and ward leaders who hear evidence and offer judgment in Church disciplinary councils.
  
  
• Include the local Relief Society president in all bishopric meetings, and rotate the planning of Sacrament services among the Relief Society president and members of the bishopric.
  
  
• Examine all Church positions to determine whether they can be filled without regard to gender.
  
  
• Appoint women as presidents of Church universities and heads of administrative departments. 
  

• Expand hiring practices in the Seminaries and Institutes of Religion and within the religion departments at Church universities to provide women the same placement, advancement, and tenure opportunities as men.

• Call young women as well as young men to serve missions at the same age and for the same length of time, and afford women the same opportunity as men to function as district leaders, zone leaders, and assistants to the president.
  
  
• Lift the prohibition on women's participation in the blessing of their children.
  
  
• Change temple marriage policies so that men and women have equal opportunity to be sealed to their second spouses after they are widowed or divorced.
  
  
• Consider further wording changes to temple ceremonies and ordinances such that both men and women make the same covenants and enjoy the same promises.
  
  
• Recognize women as witnesses for baptisms and marriage sealings.
  
  
• Restore the former institutionally-accepted practice of women giving blessings of healing and comfort.

Written September, 2012

I found the italicized ones the most important to me when it comes to equality. I know I'll probably get a lot of crap out there for putting this post, but I've been struggling for months now. I have to admit that I was this close to actually leaving the church. I was torn in half. I have grown up all my life in this church, and I believe so much of it. Should I just continue being the good-girl-attending-church-and-seminary-and-doing-Personal-Progress-and-staying-in-comfortable-silence-of-agreement or break apart and totally go off the deep end? I couldn't decide. I was literally split in half. But for a past few years, I've been realizing the kicker: There is not equality. And now that I have made that full realization, I know that I now do not have to choose either of those two decisions listed above. I am instead choosing a third option: Activism and voice for change. I hope this might solve or at least alleviate this heart-wrenching cognitive dissonance.

The church is governed in a mostly patriarchal way of leadership. I mean in no way, shape, or form to be disrespectful to any church leaders or any members of church administration whatsoever, but this is wrong. A good leader(ship) needs to represent all kinds of people it presides over. Sure, there are all kinds of men of different ethnicities, ages, and languages in the church leadership. Heck, we even have a German in the First Presidency (our well-beloved Pres. Uchtdorf). But the members of the church are not fairly represented. There are no women in any major decision-making positions in the church leadership. Sure, there's the General Relief Society Presidency, General Relief Society Board, General Young Women Presidency, and General Primary Presidency, but it seems to me all they do is visit places all over the world, give interview for PR, give a couple of talks in General Conference, and maybe get to go to a few meetings with the Prophet and Apostles. That is not equality. And I want equality in every single activity I participate in.

I remember reading somewhere that men and women are equal, but different. That's a good thing, in theory. But in practice, I believe that the "different" part is made to outweigh the "equal" part. This is one thing that desperately needs to be changed.

I fully and completely agree with every single point in the "All Are Alike Unto God" campaign. And that makes me very different from my family, and probably many members of my ward and community. I'm on the Seminary Council, for heaven's sake! Am I being a good example? Is my position of being a Mormon Feminist putting me in danger of losing this calling, or of being chastised by my Bishop? I don't know. But what I do know is that this is what I believe in. And I will not hide or keep this inside anymore. I will not continue to follow blindly. I love this church, and believe in it. But some things need to be changed.

"Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient until man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself." -2 Nephi 2:27 

 

"And it came to pass that he rent his coat; and he [Moroni] took a piece thereof, and wrote upon it—In memory of our God, our religion, and freedom, and our peace, our wives, and our children—and he fastened it upon the end of a pole. And he fastened on his head-plate, and his breastplate and his shields, and girded on his armor about his loins; and he took the pole, which had on the end thereof his rent coat, (and he called it the title of liberty) and he bowed himself to the earth, and he prayed mightily unto his God for the blessings of liberty to rest upon his brethren, so long as there should a band of Christians remain to possess the land..." -Alma 46:12-13

 I believe that our all-knowing God is one of freedom, and liberty. If He is a God of freedom and liberty, is he not a God of equality?

I hope that I will not offend anybody by these opinions. I consider myself a pretty darn good writer, but it seems that whenever I write something pretty intense, I end up getting in trouble. Hell, I even was involved in an unfortunate writing incident that got me pulled out of the middle of a Stake Young Women's Recognition Night in the chapel to be taken to the police station in 8th grade (another completely different story that makes me want to laugh my head off and cry simultaneously every single time I think about it). But I believe writing is one of my special talents or gifts I have been given from God, and I fully intend to use it.

-Kelsey